Brave/Risk

It occurs to me, that while pitching a synopsis in class that the class wanted more outrageousness in my story.  I ponder this notion as I am like, wow, do I really want to take things to the nth degree (or near it)?  The concept is simple, but the execution requires a lot more finess, rethinking and re-writing.  Am I brave enough to push past my comfort zone?   I really am at the service of the story, and I would LOVE for the story to take on stronger, interesting elements.   It means going out on a limb, which bothers me a little, BUT it also excites me.   

It's Only My Nerves

Been reading up on the next steps for my screenplay.  Yes I'm ahead of myself, but at the same time, it pays to develop long-term goals.  An agent is in my future.  Back in the day I chased publishers,  now I'm a mess .  Why?  It makes me nervous because this is new territory, and I want to run from it.  I'm scared of succeeding, and scared of failing.  Can I write another screenplay?   Is the current one good?   Why am I beating myself up?  I will never give up writing.  I might as well get used to the fact that I will expand my horizons, not as a curiosity, but as a serious craftsman.  

More Writing For Me

WRITTEN: 12-30-08
Decided to write three pages tonight.  Failed to look at my beat sheet, but I knew what the next scene would be, so I wrote it out.   I do remind myself that this is only the first draft. 

Felt that twinge of worry about the story not being “interesting” to anyone.  Yes, it’s going to nag me for a while, but that’s what happens when you’re creating.  You think of the possibilities.  It could get produced, or it can get trashed.    Like I said before, I’m still gonna finish it.  

What I do know is: It has a clear vision and direction.  I know it has a lot of potential to be a wonderful film.   One of the characters, I gained empathy for, but he’s an asshole, and that’s NOT going to change, but for a brief moment, I liked him.  I hope his charm leaps off the page.   

My Vacation Time

WRITTEN: 12-30-08
I did more than I had to with the vacation writing requirements, so I took yesterday off from writing.  I did run a few errands with Mom, and visited Grandmom again.  She was happy to see us, of course.   Needless to say I made a pit stop to see if I could pick up Primeval on DVD.   I’ll discuss that in another entry.  

Wrote a lot the day before, and I felt like I accomplished more than what I set out to do.  I ran a few errands today, and will have to write a separate entry on writing that I was inspired by.  Did do some comics shopping.   I found very little, but wasn’t looking for much.  

It was cold last night.  Not freezing, but I was cold.   It warmed up this morning.   I am tempted to peek at the Bold & the Beautiful, but I’m sure they are on the same page I left them on months ago.   Best to let them go.  More or less, picking my nose will be a better use of my time. Besides I still want to watch more of Primeval.

Page Sixty

WRITTEN: 12-28-08
I wonder if I can make it to page sixty.  I had a few setbacks, and my edits proved that I was nowhere near where I wanted to be.  Yes I am annoyed as can be. I feel nervous because a creeping voice in my head suggested that my screenplay might not be as anywhere as good as I think it may be.  It doesn’t mean I’m going to STOP writing it, cause I want to finish it.  I suppose it’s natural to question myself.  If I thought it was perfect, I guess that I would fail miserably. 

The Academic Adventure

As it stands I have a full year and five months to wrap up my MA degree.  What does this mean?  I have a lot of work to do, because once the quarter starts, I will be busy, and before I know it, the quarter will be done!   That means onto the next quarter.    Hopefully by the summer quarter I will know the full direction and scope of my adventure because I  need a solid plan in order to fulfill my dreams and passions.  

I was wondering about the graduation ceromony as well.  Should I participate?  The first thought is "no," but this is my Master's Degree.   It represents my independence.  Should I let the ceremony pass me by with a whimper?   Should I not celebreate this moment?   I DO have family and friends I'd like to share this joy with.   It's worth contemplating a little longer.        

Also Written on December 28, 2008

It’s been a warm winter for me.  Bright and sunny most of the days.  I expected cold, but I am not arguing with the end results.   Charleston’s roughly the same as I left it.  The neighborhood has gotten more ghetto.   What was at least a happy, bright neighborhood slowly becomes sad, and depressing.  One of the homes has fallen to neglect, and it looks horrible!   The porch has dry rotted and collapsed.  The grass has grown, and died.  Perhaps someone will claim the property and fix it up. 

Most of the time the family has been busy with work, as they only had one day off from work.  I’m left alone because they are busy.    A few friends have been so busy they haven’t gotten back in touch with me.   It means more screenwriting time.   LOL 

Written on December 28, 2008

Hello.  Decided that in spite of being on vacation I should write at least two pages of this screenplay a day.  Why?  Am I not entitled to some fun?   I am entitled to some fun and a good time, which I have been having.  I consider two pages nibbling on the script.  Two pages a day won’t hurt me for the rest of this week.  I am entitled to some fun, which I have been having like crazy.   What can I say, as a future screenwriter, I will be working around the clock.  Two pages a week will be the least of my worries.   It will be like major edits and notes wherever I am.  Revising at the airlines, at home with my family, at my own home, even when I sleep.  I want to complete what I have, and I want to succeed.