Unemployment Sucks Part 8: Re-Employment Program

I found visiting the Department of Labor a challenge at first.  It was busy when I went, long lines and spent the bulk of the morning in there. Still it was good to get that underway because it was needed for my well-being and the transition between my unjust termination and obtaining a new job.

Part of receiving unemployment benefits was getting into the re-employment program. I saw it like a class, and it was a series of lectures and presentations, and I got up early for them. This program helped put some pep in the motor in spite of any former unemployed person's  circumstances. The re-employment program reminded me of how valuable I am, and adds another support system for me to grow and be stronger.

There were a lot of cool benefits and I found myself submitting resumes and applications more and more. The uncool part is that I don't have a job (yet), but the time that passes tells me that kiss of death from an unjust termination lives on.  Nevertheless, I'm not giving up.  As I mentioned yesterday the grass may look greener elsewhere, but we all know different.

As always, stay strong, and never give up.

Unemployment Sucks Part 7: Speak Your Mind

As I type this I have the start of a migraine, and yes I took some Ibuprofen. I'm a go lay down in a hot minute.  Things will work themselves out like they need to.  A few minutes of rest will help resolve the pain.  

Sometimes I must cut back on the things and maintain a budget. Always hated budgeting, and being a bit more carefree with spending.  I'm single, no kids, and I love expenses, like my eduction, new movies, foods for cooking, dining out, and new clothes.  A Brother lives for some nice things.  That's a bit done for the moment as I look at what I can and can't afford.

The past two weeks of job hunting consisted of feedback, putting out applications and resumes, and crossing my fingers.  I mixed in some prayer in there too, and peeps gave me equal well wishes.  One person gave me the "thanks but no thanks" response this week.  I was disappointed, but I got over that. Can't take that spirit to another potential employer.

Unemployment Sucks Part 6: Let Me Turn This Car Around

You sometimes have to make concessions in your life and sometimes its better than nothing.  Having the inability to not pursue some of my favorite endeavors really flattened the tires of inspiration, but today is about bouncing back from perceived defeat.  First, "never give up" sounds good on paper, right?  Yes, it's very feel good phrase, somewhat annoying, but I got love for me, and faith. People have love and faith in my ability to persevere, create, and inspire even when I don't feel like I can. Theres' always something good and true about your support network. Call em up, sent a meal or text, and get that feedback.  They are here to help.

I recognize I'm not identified by my job, and if I were I think my unjust termination would've destroyed me.  Was I proud about working? Was I having a good lifestyle?  Was I working in spite all negativities?  Oh yes I was. keeping up a professional demeanor no matter the process is magic. Somehow this hasn't kept me from being able to live, talk to people, and laugh. I laugh a lot.  I got jokes, stories, amusing adventures I share.  I have my blogs, and I still write.

So in the sense that I get that woe is me feeling when i'm driving through life, let me turn this car around.  I'm going on that highways where the people are happy, productive, and love themselves. One thing to always remember as you see others having what you think is success and you're not.  The grass always looks greener on the other side, however, you don't know what's going on past the surface.  We may be in a post-Post Modern world, BUT everything that looks good, and good for you, and all that glitters ain't gold. Remember those phrases as you get that nagging thought that some are better off cause they have what you don't material wise. For me, prayer, meditation, love and support always gets me through. Getting that good night's sleep, stepping into a new morning, and keeping it moving is a priceless act that pays now, and sows seeds for the future. Invest in yourself. God will help save you.    

Unemployment Sucks Part 5: School's Out (For Now)

For the moment, I can kiss my graduate dreams goodbye for now as looking for a job takes top priority. Sometimes our dreams and goals are on hold, and it feel like there's no light at the tunnel for completion of said dreams. It feels like life's been sucked right out of me, as if my goals and dreams aren't worth a rat's nasty behind at the moment. That really stinks, but as always optimism lives with me, and my peeps remind me all the time that things will get better.

For those who don't have peeps telling them this, and you need to hear it, listen to me now, THINGS WILL GET BETTER.  It does take time and it is a frustrating situation to live through, but we are strong people, and this is but a footnote in our histories. Our strength is being tested by adversity.  I know I've taken a lot of hits.  I've been tested many times, and I manage to come through.  I'll do it again.

In addition to the woes, I'm reevaluating where I obtain my masters degree. While I think highly of my professors, and learned a lot from them, I worked where I went to school, and being unjustly terminated placed the entire university in a different light.  Professors aside, do I -- should I return to a place that treated me in such a poor, disrespectful manner? Would I not be better off in a place where I didn't feel like I was disrespected, and contributed monetarily to a company like the former place of business?  These are things worth contemplating and helping me move onto better prospects. Let me tell you, the best for me has yet to come.

I will say this with most confidence, in the past, my ancestors have been disrespected, and now so have I, but we all endure our struggles, heartaches and pains. We move forward. It is that strength, support, and love that has made all my experiences worthwhile and allowed me to see and move beyond the negatives. Entitlement, works for some, but others such as ourselves put in the time to make sure things are done. I don't have the luxury of entitlement.  I do know what my parents told me, and my grandpaprents, and the stories I've know all my life. You gotta take stands somewhere in your life, or you will fall for anything.

Unemployment Sucks Part 4: Keep Your Head Up

Staying positive after loosing one's job is much easier said than done.  It really kills the good will and mentality to progress or feel satisfied in life.  No matter what the reason is that you're no longer work at your job, you've got to flourish and keep your head up. The opposite is to lay down and accept defeat.  If no one ever says it, "we are worth every bit of success that we once had and then some," I'm saying it for us.  The determination and ability to handle this upset is but a stepping stone in life.  This is but an experience to discuss and to overcome.  We all have strength in the face of adversity.  

Admittedly I was down when I was unjustly terminated, but I know I couldn't rest on this point.  I believe that the experience, the worries, and the fears are all natural.  I went through them. I suffered the woes, but I'm not giving up, and neither should anyone else. In addition to job searches, resume updates, job fairs, and meetings on career/interview improvements, nothing's gelled yet. Still I refuse to give up. Giving up isn't considered because I have to take care of myself.  Also I love working.

Let's face it, jobs do more than give us a paycheck.  Jobs give us structure, routines, and a sense of achievement. Being removed from these productive elements is not only draining, but depressing.  Sadly there's no manual for how to survive this kind of upset.  All that anyone can do is try their hardest to keep their head up. Family and friends kept my spirits moving in a positive direction, as well as prayer, meditation, and any form of distraction I could find, like playing games, TV shows, and looking at old films in my home.

One bad thing I did was watch reality shows. When I was employed I never watched them.  I'm reminded why I didn't like them as I type this post. A lot of the shows are awful and negative.  I wasn't made to hold this kind of drama in my psyche. Attempting to pull away was a hot mess of me being curious, which is not where I need to place my focus. I guess that's as low as I go. I feel lucky because some people don't stop with reality shows.  Substance abuse comes into the picture for some. That's a dark road I pray no one has to fall into.

My only suggestion is to find things that help you take your mind off your woes.  For me writing is one of my strengths, so I'm putting this to use now.  I love to cook, southern/soul food cuisines. Maybe one day I should try baking.  Make a cake from scratch, or a box. So long as it gets made. Music also takes my mind off a lot of heaviness for brief moments at a time.  We gotta keep things progressing.  Don't fall into a slump.  It happened, but we have the power to move away. It's not easy, but then again, the things worth having are never easy to achieve.    

Unemployment Sucks Part 3: Me, Hardships, and Unemployment Benefits

A lot of people never have to think about being terminated, and I pray that most never will.  Quite frankly, termination cuts to the bone. In my case, the rug was totally pulled from under me. One day I had a job, the next day, I didn't. I claim unjust termination because of the facts surrounding my termination, and that I received unemployment benefits in spite of my former employer's sly attempt to tap dance around the truth and employee laws. I believe greatness shall come from my experiences. That these horrible transgressions shall be a thing of the past to share with others.

Being terminated for any reason leaves a person in a vulnerable financial and psychological state. After all, how do you explain why you don't have a job anymore to family and friends?  How do you tell your former co-workers what happened to you?  How do you pay your bills, your rent, car repairs, groceries, and subscriptions you may have (like HBO,  magazines, group dues, etc.)? It's quite the hardship, let me tell you.

Adjusting is the hard part. I love my life and the things it brought me to be better in life and succeed.  To give these things up is a huge step backwards.  In fact it puts me near the poverty line. This is very, very scary. At the same time prayer, meditation, family and friends really help lift my spirits.

Loss of my steady income means sometimes I must pay my bills late, and that's a pet peeve of mine. Promptness with bills affords me security and happiness as opposed to bringing my stress levels to new heights, which happens all the time now. Without a steady job, I have no steady income.  I reluctantly kissed the old lifestyle goodbye.  I really can't really relocate for another job because the new apartment complex will want to know how I'm going to pay them, and they don't accept that I "might" get a job. What's that to anyone? Where to do I find the money to relocate? As a friend pointed out to me, in my case, one viable option available to me is moving in with a relative.  

Unemployment benefits saved me from the complete financial crisis that unjust termination brought into my life.  According to employee law; Section 34-8-194 former employees can't collect unemployment benefits if he or she is the cause of their termination.  For example, lateness on a daily basis could not only be grounds for termination, it would mean I couldn't collect unemployment benefits due to it being my fault I was terminated.  For that matter any company violations would apply here.  There were no company violations on my part. I received unemployment benefits.

Unemployment Sucks Part 2: Where'd That Insurance Go?

For those not in the know the benefits from many full-time jobs are amazing and I loved having insurance.  The power of insurance should never be underestimated. my insurance covered medical expenses.  For a chronic allergy sufferer such as myself, prescribed meds work the best, as my allergies went out of control to a point of barely manageable.  It's not pretty, allergy symptoms, but having coverage was worth it's expense.  Dental and eye exams are very important to me as well.  For those of us who are nearsighted having check-ups mean a lot. I did need to get my health check ups in as well, since I'm not getting younger.

On the job front: New application and my resume submitted to another place of employment.  Let's hope that "kiss of death" is washed out  (I doubt it).  I, however repeat, I'm not giving up. Prayer and meditation helps a lot.  The things I do helps keep me calm, focused, and positive. What I draw additional inspiration from is that I am my own man, and I survive in spite of the things thrown at me.  That's a Haynes thing. Never give up. Never surrender.  Also keep it moving.  Let other people wallow in misery.  The best has yet to come, and we will thrive.    

Unemployment Sucks: Part 1

It doesn't matter how you got to the road of unemployment (unjust termination, just termination, layoff, company bankrupt), it simply sucks.  This is my story of unemployment, and the hopeful road to survival, recovery, and triumph over adversity. My hopes with these posts are to help/inspire those in the same situations to grow and be inspired.  Sometimes all we need is someone to support and encourage us for success. If you're struggling like I am, then you know giving up is not an option.

Being someone who was unjustly terminated, I can tell you that the main point for me right now is to attempt to restore my financial status and obtain gainful employment elsewhere. I can say, with experience, placing the word "termination" on any application is like the kiss of death. It suggests to some that you weren't a good employee, however any forced termination is undefined.  For example, you could have loss your job due to transportation failures, accidents, and unforseen actions beyond your control. I'm fortunate I receive unemployment benefits, which helps me out some.

Needless to say I think trying to lie on applications is a mistake. It does feel like chains on the shoulder. A burden one's forced to deal with.  At the same time, I know my strengths, track record, and skills I offer.  It's a lot of work to keep up keeping on.  Never giving up is the best motto at this stage.

Keep It Real

I hope to put my best foot forward in situations, but sometimes even the best foot needs an evaluation. Being good does not mean being a blank slate. It doesn't mean no matter what you have to be kind and benevolent. Being good means your word is your bond. You commit to your decisions. You don't back down.

I'm not perfect in the least. I've failed at several things. I don't expect perfection from others around me. I do, however expect a modest amount of respect. Time and experience taught me that a lot of people aren't aren't always looking for respect. They can't be honest in the least, and most of all they want my respect. I got news for you. You want that respect thats due? You want that loyalty that comes from being down for whatever? You want me to remember that relationships are a two way street? I hear you. I want that too. I also need something else you need to be mindful of: taking these virtues for granted. As patient as I've been in the past, I'm done with it.

No man's patience is infinite. I'm tired and I don't have to be nice about it. The things I want out of life are before me. Time to move away from negative influences and gravitate towards the positive.