New Black Swan post at SDCS

I realize not everyone reads both of my blogs, but I do post to this and Several Deadly CINEs.  For those not in the know, CINES (or as I call it SDCS) is my Cinema Studies blog.  I created in part to dedicate it to media, while keeping this blog a bit more personal.  

The goal isto update both frequently.   While it won't be planned posts, the updates will be done a lot more frequent.  

So for those a little curious about the Black Swan film, I have the post ready for you to see.

Saturdazed

Feeling a bit blah today, and didn't do much of anything.  Decided that I should write something, be it on the laptop or in my notepad.  Perhaps a little of both today.   I really need to get on the ball with things.   Spend way too much time online goofing off yesterday.  

Tonight is left over spaghetti and salad.   I dunno if I will make anything tomorrow.  May just pull stuff out of the freezer.  

Decided to watch The Two Towers.   It's my background movie today.  

Hello World

Spent the day loafing about.  I knew I had nowhere to go today.  Made sausage and scrambled eggs for breakfast when I got up.   I'm rather indulgent today.   I know I need to write more on my projects, and I failed to get my package in the mail.  I'm a freaking doof sometimes, but I needed to not go anywhere.  I insist on getting three plots done today.

On a side note I hand wrote out a few ideas.   Gotta keep that up or face being too inactive.  

Dreams and Early Start

Woke up early this morning and I remember some kooky dreams.  I'll go write them down cause they felt like they have story potential.  I did make myself go back to bed.  I felt that I should not be so eager to get up and waste precious sleep time.  At first I thought I wasn't going to fall back asleep, but then it happened.

Take that early morning!

I worked on my thesis some more.  It was a paltry display of work effort today, however, I managed to back up my material, so I feel that alone is worth the efforts.  Oh, I need to eat a meal.  I can't live on good thoughts alone.  I may go write and research some more.   I saw a good article on Douglas Sirk I want to read through.   I also have a couple more articles I'd love to read.

The Works Cited page is done, or at least all the info is on one page.  I will need to fine tooth comb this sucker cause I want it to stand out.

Had to run a couple of errands today.  One of them being going to the post office, and I left one of the packages at home.  I am really a hot mess this week.  I think I need to make a list of the things I need done, then work at them.  As it stands I am not organized this week.

The new quarter starts this week.   I really love the rush of new people.  I however know that rush has pros and cons.   Lord help me.    

2011

Insisted on getting a haircut this morning.  I needed one, and that meant getting up early to beat the crowd.   I had three people in front of me.  That means I got up too late, AND like everyone else, I waited until after the holidays to maintain my do.  I look nice now.  Got the beard and mustache trimmed as well.  Now I feel and look sexy.  

My last post of the year. Its been a sparse time. I need to write more.

I am sad I haven't blogged more, or that my posts were longer, but I am happy to write more.

I should make something to eat. I want French toast for breakfast and chili for dinner.

Woke up this morning with an idea and wrote it down. Now I have a page full of notes.

Early morn and I need some coffee or a latte.

You the best part of waking up is I wanna go right back to sleep.

I so need a meal right now.

Let's go vote!!!

Poor sleep today. More than irritated with that. Hope to make the day good in spite of this.

Unusually warm today. Not that I'm complaining. It feels so good.

Should drink more water cause sodas are not happening all the time. Not feeling like I'm doing good with balancing my intakes.

Should I cook tomorrow or get takeout?

I need to figure what's for dinner. My firsr thought is "take out."

For the first time in a good while I slept later than 8:00 AM. That felt good. Ironically I could have benefited from getting up early to run errands.

OMG Gray hair that's visible! ON MY HEAD!!! *pouts*

BLACKSTAR WARRIOR TRAILER FOUND!!!

At home being lazy.

At A Crossroads

It’s been a while since I wrote something on YIWTB.   This blog has been with me for some time, and yes I feel a lot guilty, and at the same time I feel relief.   I have been writing, but for my Cinema Studies Blog, AND I’ve been tied up in work and classes.  I’m having one of those crossroads things were I need to take a look at where I’m at and what I’m doing.  Where am I going?   

Time to make a five year plan and mean it.   

Zordon is a Racist

ROBERT PALMER - I DIDN'T MEAN TO TURN YOU ON - EXTENDED VERSION - ( 1986...

Natalie Portman SNL Rap Still Rocks

Its a rare sensational but a few characters sing to me. Its sweet like red wine.

Today is take out day. I won't cook.

Can't people let me sleep?

The Losers - Official Trailer [HD]

The Losers - Official Trailer [HD]

MadTV - Whitney Screws Up The Classics

This has LMAO! Written all over it! Thanks to April for sharing.

Shirtless Sundays

So I spent one Sunday morning looking for something to wear to work.  The khakis were easy to find.  The socks (bough a new pack) were even easier to grab a hold (BTW nothing beats that "new sock" feel).   The shirts... That's where the problem lay.  You see, I had some shirts I kept meaning to wash, and those few shirts turned into nearly all my shirts.   It didn't help that I didn't put them in the laundry basket, but peppered them about my place.  Not one of my finer moments.

I found a couple of suspect clean shirts on the floor, and there was no way I could wear those.  They smelled like floor, and who wants that?  Floor smell is barely tolerable by the house owner and no one else, unless you're Strawberry Shortcake.  I'd watch out for her homemade jams, by the way. 
   
Of course then, it dawned on me that I should have washed on Saturday, when I had the free time to do so.   So I gather ALL my shirts.  Not just the dirty ones, but the ones I know that are marginally clean.  By marginal, I mean I can't tell if they're dirty, BUT someone else might see or smell it better than I do.  I don't go places to offend people, or at least that's what I tell myself.   Most of all, I can't  have my co-workers think I live in a garbage can like Oscar the Grouch. I'd be mortified.

So I gather all the dirty clothes, old socks, shirts, underpants, and t-shirts, and take them to the laundry.  The change machine should have came with a warning.  It spits coins at you.  Was not prepared for the assault of quarters that came at me.  Coins were on the floor, in the little pocket, and I'm surprised none went for my eyes. 

I wash, I wait.  The smart thing I did manage was to bring my iPod with me.  Of course I brought some paper, but forgot the pen.  Talk about useless.   I left the fabric softer home.  I needed two washing machines, and one HUGE dryer to get it all done.  Bought two sheets of fabric softner for $1.00.  Not bad.  

Deux

My questions for myself tonight:

1. What do I want to do with my life?
2. What am I doing to achieve my goals?

Late night and I have much to get done.

No sleep for me! Revisions are in order. Gotta love a cold night and a plan.

Not sure of what to wear tomorrow. Will worry about it when the time comes.

I am waiting in a steak I wish to devour now! I live a well-done Ribeye. T-bone seems like a waste.

It was so warm today. Now its cold as can be. Brrrrrr!

Also feel a need to make dinner. I want ribs, collards, rice and some baked macaroni. Can I do this all?

I have two papers that need revising. I hope that I get them done.

I feel I can manage my work. I need to clear my mind, which is filled with so much doubts. I will succeed at my dream.

I thought about writing more which I should have done a while ago. I'm so tired of waiting for a good inspiration. What shall I do?

The E-Book, The E-Reader

I've hear some pros and cons on this, and I fall on the pro side of this.  For one, as a student, I find that several books I need from the catalog have been e-books.  I've read them online, and I wasn't bothered by them.  They had info I needed.

Likewise they do not, in my heart replace any hard copy book I've purchased. For me, sometimes I have to lug some heavy books around to get some readings and discoveries completed.  

Now I image having an e-reader might make life a little less complicated.  Not that I would abandon my hard copies, BUT it might be nice to have several books in the palm of my hand and not have to lug books around.!  

Furthermore think of the space I could save in my home with an e-reader. 

Again, I love books, will read them, love having pages to turn and bookmark.  I'm not saying no to books.  In fact I am proud of the books I purchased for my Cinema Studies classes.   They are truly a treasure (one of them is offered as an e-book-what an intriguing prospect).  I am saying yes to trying the e-reader (as pricy as they are) and loving the chance to use a new medium for reading.

Now for the big $259.00 question: The Nook or Kindle as an e-reader.      

The snow is gone! I feared I would be prisoner in my own home. Was also afraid of the cold. Had breakfast (French Toast) which was good!

Looked outside and saw snow and ice on my car. I will not leave my home unless it melts.

Saw Dante's Inferno game. It looks scary and exciting. I wonder how the game plays. It reminds me of God of War.

Its rainy and cold. Worst combo ever. Its a good night to chill and be thankful for love and support. Say an extra prayer for all the blessings.

Outside so cold. Not feeling the winter at all. Gotta go through it though. Wish I wore thermals tonight. It really makes me uncomfortable.

Wonders after viewing some fantasy images if he dint make his story too tame. I really need to get this story past my pedestrian way of thinking.

Goals 2010

Well I'm looking at my goals to see where I am these days with them.  I have plenty written down and I have some things I'm simply accessing their status to see how far I've come.  Well Graduate school reaches it peach with less than four months left of it.  Am I nervous.  Oh, Yeah I am.  Can't seem to get my mind clear and complete a thing.  

I feel rushed, emotional, and annoyed.  I don't see the finish line, BUT I do see the mess that is my life.   Work seems to turn chaotic and classes seem out of grasp.  I'm praying for peach in my head, and that it extends to my physical world.  

The Wolfman - Official Trailer [HD]

I've been awake since 5:00 AM yesterday and have yet to go back to sleep. Being ill robbed me of pleasurable sleep. I hope I get rest tonight.

Its so frackin cold again. Never mind being sick. Outside's simply not a place to be.

Food poisoning. Lovely.

Bye-Bye Comics?

A funny thing happened last year while finishing my finals.  I decided I could hold off on buying comics.   I could always do it the week after, right?  Well the next week came, and nothing.  The next payday came, and no desire to go to the local comic books shop and pick up some comics.   Even during my near two months break from classes did not inspire me to buy books.   I began to think, it wasn't worth it at all.

I'm a little embarrassed, cause I used to buy them all the time.  Even when my money was tight I bought a subscription to one comic.  Always read them.   This time around, I backed off the entire medium.

You see, it occurred to me, that sometimes the things I read did not inspire me.  I wasn't having fun.  In fact I was outright bored.   What's the point of paying for something and not feeling the material?   So until I get that feeling or curiosity, one can forget me purchasing something. 

So for now, bye-bye comics.

Mistake

Mistake

A mistake has happened
I keep it around to punish myself
But I ought to let it go

If truly I was in prison,
Then the pay for the crime is life
I see no escape in sight
Do I want one?  

I hold the lock and the key
I made the prison
Brick by brick
Lovingly designed

So foolish of me to commit to a crime
That has long faded from the world view
I made several mistakes.  
For sure I should let them go.

Wanted to get a haircut then a meal. It got complicated as the barber shop was closed and didn't reopen at the said time. Waiting a few more moments for it.

Its warmer than yesterday. I hate the freezing cold for sure. Glad to have a reprieve from it.

Keep Writitng

I encourage all my writing friends to not stop writing, where the story is good or bad.  I wish for all of you to keep writing!   If you're procrastinating,  then I hope you find the courage to do what must be done to get the story complete.  sometimes, I say only five sentences are needed today, and that gets the ball rolling.   Five sentences is not that hard to put onto the paper.   Write with me.       

Get The Ball Rolling

Not sure where the phrase comes from.   I do know it means that I should initiate my actions/desires.  That's what I am here to talk about.  I said I wanted to be a writer.  I said I like fiction and nonfiction.  I ask myself what am I doing to get the ball rolling on this topic. 

Writing produces anxiety and fear in me, as well as excitement.   Mind you, I love writing.  I love connecting the words, and I love revising.  I am scared of both success and failure.  Writing is a career that you will get your heart broken several times, and it will never stop. 

To write means to give up being timid, or afraid of what may become of one's craft.   I procrastinate, I work on other projects.  I refuse to write sometimes, except when my back is to the wall and I am forced.   That is not being proactive, squandering time and talents. 

Here's what I know:  I've been wanting to write since I was three and my brother came home and showed me what writing is.  I've stumbled a lot, but i kept on writing.  I've been rejected so many times, and I never stopped writing.  

If I'm going to write, I'm going to have to accept my own fears, weaknesses and strengths.  I've got to be willing to be naked in front of a crowd of people and be revealed.  I cannot allow myself to be intimidated by others' judgments of me.   I cannot be afraid of my own will and voice. 

If I am to succeed at anything, I must accept that I am not perfect.  I must accept that I will be judged unfairly, many times over.  I must accept that I am scared, but that I can overcome fear.  I can exceed the limitations I think I've placed on myself.   I will not be held down or back from my dreams.

Too long have I feared my inability to withstand rejection and judgments, but that's over with.  If I seem raunchy, crude, excessive, obnoxious, demented, brazen, wild, insensitive, etc.  It is time to face those judgements, and see if they hold true, can I improve, or shall I wallow in self-pity.

I am Stacy R. Haynes, and I'm a writer, who's no longer afraid of getting the ball rolling!  

Pasta and Billy Wilder Today

While reading some articles on Billy wilder (which reminds me to check out some books on Wilder too), I decided that I should make some spaghetti for dinner.   It was a very simple meal to prepare.  I browned the ground chuck, sauteed the mushrooms, garlic, and onions.  Added the sauce. Seasoned with salt, pepper, a little sugar (to cut the acidic taste) and Italian seasonings.   Made the pasta and now it's done.  

I left out the Italian sausage, or any additional goodies (should have got some garlic bread).  Have some garden salad already made to go alongside the spaghetti.   Now back to reading.         

I had a lot of nervous energy today. I was more than incapable of composing my thoughts. In spite of trying I felt I was trying a lost cause.

Not as cold as yesterday. There is a rumor of snow and ice, which would suck so bad. Hope that it doesn't come true.

The first post of the new year! Man its too cold for my comfort. I like warmer weather and prefer to stay inside! Maybe it will warm up inside and make my day!

Hello. Its raining. Don't like it. I feel like I'm gonna keep from being under the weather. Must run errands. More on that later.

Decided to give Caprica a chance via OnDemand since its free.

Congestion

I have yucky chest congestion.   I loathe the discomfort and the meds.  Not sure if this is a cold or allergy.   My temperature's on its own course.  I my temperature was a little high today.  Started sweating.   The congestion broke up some.   I feel that it will be better. 

Nyquil pills are a must since my congestion is intensifying.

In the mood for a burger again. Gonna wolf it down along with some fries!

Another cold day. I hurried to my ride and getting it warmed up now. Temperature gage barely moved. Gonna wait until it does. Should break out the thermals.

Four Stories Project II

Well I originally wussed out on the four stories project, by not completing a damn thing before bad.  I failed myself that was more than shameful.  I call myself a serious writer when I would not take the time to write twenty sentences.   If I did them on the computer, I would get them done quicker. I should have at least wrote one of them down on paper.   I was lazy.  I decided to play Zuma, Kingdom Hearts, and Meteos.  I had a good time with each.

I also listened to that voice in my head that told me the stories weren't "versatile enough."  I was wrong.  Like novelists don't write in the same genre, or screenwriters for that matter.  I was a fool to turn away from something that I love.  If a new concept warranted it, then it would find a way to the surface.

Free time presented itself today and I told myself that I was going to write at LEAST two paragraph for four concepts today.  I did just that.  Intially I felt I cheated with project 2 because I had a partial beat outline concieved from previous works.  I did manage to make up for that by writing a lot for story three.  Not that Story two was unclear to me at all.  I wanted to integrate the newer material/ideas.

I have a story five and six

Working out some ideas that I like. More on this later. Its so cold outside. Moving my car, which needs to warm up before I drive off.

I am most hungry. I should eat breakfast. It will give me the boost I need for the day, instead of my tummy growling.

Decided I wanted a burger for dinner in spite of having pasta at home. Gotta get me some more Epsom salt cause I need my muscles to relax.

Four Stories Project

I have a new project that will be fun tonight.   I will write out the first paragraph out to four stories.   They don't have to be correct, but I want at bare minimum five sentences written down about each plot.  Tomorrow I will add five more sentences, and so forth.  The goal is to have a specific vision of each story.  The concepts may not pan out, but instead of thinking of what could happen, I will have something concrete I can edit for the sake of clarity.     

I feel a little blah and tired. Today was a migraine coupled by ibuprofen, and a trip back to bed. Not my clearest day. Watched parts of Tin Man too.

Feet hurt but not crampy. Resting on my bed. Watching "Criminal Minds."

This Is Bananas

Well, not really.   Let me explain.   I went to the grocery store after work.  my feet were killing me.  I walked past the bananas saying to myself, "I should pick up some."  I walked away wanting to get off my feet.   I decided to buy the ingredients to make Chicken Alfredo.  I got home, started cooking.  Boy were my feet tired.

While sitting and waiting, the dreaded foot cramp shows up.  Needless to say it was mildly uncomfortable.  Since I was online, I updated my Facebook status.  A friend comments that potassium would help with the pain.   Namely bananas.  Of course I walked past them in the store even though I wanted some.

So I suffered though the pain and took a multi-vitamin which has potassium, BUT I'm told the banana's effectiveness would be much quicker. 

By the way, the Chicken Alfredo was great.  Used shredded Parmesan and mozzarella cheese along with heavy cream in the sauce.   Tastes delish.  

Its cold outside! Waiting for my car to warm up before driving off. Gotta let the engine get power and heat
"Dress You Up" is the song to start the day.

Thanks God I wore the "cozy shoes" today. Needed to let my feet relax a little. Been feeling like it made me more tense. The new shoes do look good though.

Gonna have a steak buddy! Ribeye is the bomb!

Dunno what's for dinner tonight. Last night was chicken, mashed taters, and coleslaw. Want something good.

Should make chicken alfredo this weekend. I am hoping to make the sauce creamer! Yeah! Good and rich cooking!

I don't know what to fix for dinner. Thought about Chinese food. Not sure about anything. Should do seafood. Mainly cause its simple.

Writing More

I need to write more for this blog.  Classes are over, we're on break, and I think I can spare five sentences a day.   Yeah, I can.

Well was inspired to write out a plot for a fairy tale/urban fantasy.  The thing I like is that I can write and it doesn't have to be perfect.  All it needs to be is on the page.  I need to get the gist of the idea onto the paper so that I have a rough idea what things look like.  Some ideas feel better than others, but I don't know until I commit to it!

I'm happy to take the time to go through the process.  I can tell you the story is a rough as having sandpaper for skin.  LOL  It needs to be that way.  I need to tighten it up, and get it aligned with my story structure tools.  it's a challenge,, and the stuff that I like to do!  

I am most hungry. Need to eat a meal like now. Left my pen at my desk. How am I to write something in my notebook? Too hungry to worry.

Been hungry for a full meal. Want to catch the second half of Alice tonight.

Today I misplaced my wallet. Spent a good deal of time trying to find it. Found it hanging in the pants I had on yesterday.

My Life

It’s been an interesting day.  Forgive me for not posting sooner.   It’s like I went through a dry patch of academics and working.  I am more than happy that I made it through the fall quarter.  I felt very overwhelmed with classes and work.   The all-nighters, I hope will never be repeated, UNLESS the writing IS my job.  For two days I felt like I didn’t know what was going to happen. 

The good news is that I passed my classes.  I got one an A and a B.   That’s not bad.  Taking this victory and walking away very happy.   I did want two A’s though.

Did I mention I have two quarters left of graduate school.   I'm nervous and excited.      

Encore has the nerve to play "Batman and Robin." SMH

Worst southern meal ever: grits and pork n' beans!

This does mean I skipped the coffee.

Mmmm I should not have egg nog, but Lactaid should make it better.

I'm cold. Want something hot to drink. Coffee's in mu future. Don't wanna do anything. Beta get up.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Chilling for the moment. Must have a happy holiday.

New Moon | Spill.com Movie Reviews

I so need to post more updates.   Writing my final paper.  Busy, busy, busy.  

Cooking: The Conclusion

For those who wondered about my cooking: The peas and rice turned out well.  They taste good.  I feel accomplished.  Now I don't have to cook for a few days.  :)  

The weather today was very warm.  I felt hot outside.  Traffic around my way still confounds me.  people drive below the speed limit and some cross lanes without so much as a glance back to see what's in the next lane, or use a turn signal.   Weird!