Like Distant Thunder

So, I started having these thoughts of how to improve my life. Of course, it's a million miles per minute in that head of mine, so narrowing down the list is a considerable challenge. Nonetheless, the ideas of having success don't go away easily. I want to start writing, and being published professionally. I don't think it will be easy, I don't think I will be famous by this, but I do want to give it my best try. This mess looking at more avenues, and trying new ways of doing things. This also means being independent. Something that is both exciting, and terrifying.

It's easy to fall back on family, because that's a network. It can also be a crutch, and I'm feeling like I'm leaning way to hard on them. I'd like to see a world where I can chill without being in someone else's space. My bills are paid on time, and there is money in my bank account for me to do with as I please. I'd also love to see my creative side appear, and become the major contributor to my success as an artist. No more "what if's" this time. I want to see something tangible that I can build my life on. I'm craving a direction, and shedding the notion of being tied to one place. I want my life to have meaning, and not be so flat. Can I not have all that I desire if I work hard enough for it.

I don't feel sad about this. I don't even feel down. I feel myself going though changes, and that scares me sometimes. Change means breaking old habits, and combfort zones. Change is the crumbling of old defenses like rotting wood. Things don't go back to status quo. They are changed for good. I didn't know I desired anything until I woke up and decided that my life needed direction. I am the chick that just hatched into the world. That's what makes me feel great about the change. I'm also excited because I know I am heading in the right direction. I will be successful. I will grow, learn, and become a better person. I pray to God for the strength to see my visions through to completion.

There is no Song Of The Day. You pick one. Tell me if it's cool. I just might listen to it.