Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Plucked From the Vine

We all have one. It’s that voice in our heads that tells us not to do certain things. In my writing, I have found myself having a very LOUD censor. He’s a nitpicky bastard. Think CP30 a little louder, and more prone to give his opinion whenever he sees fit. Yeah, ugly, right.

Needless to say I am having some rough times with my writing, as I have been trying to get my act together, and write things worth writing, and not simply repeating ideas I have read before. This is where the censor comes in. He hates my ideas. He thinks I should stay within the confines, however, I know I don’t have to. I am trying new ideas, for better or worse. Some of them make me so nervous, and are certainly a risk. I feel it’s a worthy risk, as I know that some of the ideas are raw, and I am willing to pluck them from the vine.

So let me say that I wish to remove the censor in my head from his unflinching guarding of my comfort zone. He gets to retire gracefully. His annoying self did his job. He is a part of me. Needless to say, it was I who stopped myself from exploring my own horizons. For no better reasoning, I feared the unknown, and what I am capable of.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Virginia Woolf referred to it as "The Angel in the House." It's the angel in a woman's head that tells her to be kind, polite, and not say those icky bad things when she writes because it might offend someone. "Or better yet, you shouldn't write at all, because that isn't proper." Blah. Stupid angel. I think it also applies here, with you. Censor, angel, they all belong to the same club.

Woolf said she killed it in self defense. I try to stab that bitch in the eye with a quill pen whenever I get the chance, but she's a sly one, and I'm no Virginia Woolf. I understand where you're coming from though.

http://etext.library.adelaide.edu.au/w/woolf/virginia/w91d/chap28.html

Unknown said...

LOL

Woolf had it bad. Like me. Like all of us. I picked CP30, because he is such a nag in the films. That's how I feel when I write.

Glad to know I'm not the only one. Thanks for the link too. BTW.